


Lunacy

by DimensionSlip



Series: Under the Moonlight [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Bondage, Courtesan AU, Courtesan Felix, Explicit Sexual Content, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 13:50:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21254408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DimensionSlip/pseuds/DimensionSlip
Summary: This isn't how Felix wants Dimitri to see him.





	Lunacy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [taiwonton](https://archiveofourown.org/users/taiwonton/gifts).

> If reading about sexual favors and a fictional depiction of prostitution (*cough* vague NTR vibes *cough*) is not your thing, then I advise that you turn away and play it safe. Otherwise, please carry on! That's probably the only sketchy thing in this fic, for the most part (aka the first 1000 words). <s>And Dimitri and Felix's communication issues, but that hardly is news to anyone here.</s>
> 
> This fic was inspired by a line from Tai's Courtesan AU brainstorming and the [Felix art](https://twitter.com/taiwonton/status/1188294260912726016) that came out of it. Please thank them and their wonderful brain for coming up with the concept!

_It's just for a night._

That is what Felix tells himself, repeats like a mantra when he has to deal with a difficult customer. Tonight is no exception, even with Annette furrowing her brows at him from across the room as his man for the night tugs at his robes, dragging him in for a kiss he never means.

But Felix accepted the job, lest Annette be the one subject to it. He has to see it through, even if he is reduced to nothing more than a tool, hanging on to empty promises that grow and ring hollow in his ears by the day. They multiply by zero, along with the repayment of his debt that never ends and his hopes for another future, different from the cards that the goddess has dealt him.

That's what his life is, and always will be.

* * *

Lord Arundel slips a hand beneath his robes, caressing him as he hits up the noble next to him for a chat. Felix smiles through it, pouring tea as if nothing is wrong with the world, his painted lips betraying none of his disgust as he is treated to a reminder of what's to come later once everyone else has filed out of the banquet hall, and he and his client retreat to their chambers.

_It's just for a night._

* * *

The door to the room slides open as Lord Arundel completes his preparations and begins to thrust into Felix. Felix cuts off a gasp at the unexpected interruption, gaze snapping towards the new arrival, eyes uncharacteristically wide with shock as he beholds a familiar face by the sliding doors.

"A pleasure to _finally_ see you, Alex."

Despite the lack of surprise in Lord Arundel's tone, the same look on Felix seems to overcome the newcomer's expression as well. But Felix isn't sure and thinks he may simply imagined it, for his thoughts scatter to the wind as a shock of pleasure courses through his system when Lord Arundel slams into him once more, never taking it easy despite the fact that they've only gotten started.

Lord Arundel grunts as the door slides close, shifting his hold on Felix's thighs.

"...Or would you rather be called 'Prince Dimitri', perhaps—"

Squeezing roughly, Lord Arundel raises Felix's hips as he drives into Felix once more, bottoming out with the thrust. Felix tosses his head back and groans, a deeply ingrained instinct which colors his already reddened cheeks.

"That is hardly necessary, Lord Arundel."

Felix could feel Dimitri's gaze on him, the latter's eye boring into him as Lord Arundel rams into him again, the force of it shaking the wooden pillar he's bound to. His chest feels tight, and he isn't entirely sure what's causing it—the network of ropes that snake over the thin layer of silk covering his torso making it hard to breathe, or something else altogether.

_Don't look._

The building heat in his core is at odds with the thought that crosses Felix's mind when he recalls Dimitri's expression, as with the foreign emotion that washes over him as he keeps his gaze averted from Dimitri.

_Stop it._

But that's something Felix doesn't have the luxury to say out loud, even as Lord Arundel continues to fuck into him and proceeds to pry out the sighs and moans that he paid for, not all of them faked. Today, Lord Arundel has bought Felix's pride, a hefty amount sure to have dented his coffers—or perhaps the empire's as Felix has come to suspect. Rope burns are hardly becoming of a top courtesan after all, even if most of it will be hidden by the expensive cloths showered upon him. It may be a while until he'd be desirable for this type of service again, and that's a risk the house can only afford to take with sufficient recompense.

"...Should I come back later?" Dimitri asks, tone strained. "You seem quite—"  
  
"I'll be done soon."

_And that he is._ Lord Arundel never takes long with him, even if at that moment, it feels like forever until he thrusts deeply into him and finally comes, cock twitching inside of Felix as he fills him with his seed.

While not enough to drive him over the edge, Felix's own arousal twitches, painfully aching at the lack of attention. He bites down on his lower lip as he struggles to breathe through Lord Arundel's release, straining against the rope as if the futile action would free him from this situation he signed up for. It shouldn't bother him, being seen like this. His body is a canvas as much as the scrolls he paints over, or the dances and arrangements he takes the time to execute, each step perfect. And this isn't the first time he's had to bare himself like a common whore. Not by any means, as the top courtesan of this house.

But when it's Dimitri bearing witness to _this_, Felix finds himself filled with a sense of wrongness. Dimitri, who comes to buy his time to _talk_, and nothing more except the occasional strategy board game.

As Lord Arundel pulls out of him and lowers his legs, Dimitri speaks, and Felix dares to glance his way, seeing his brow furrow in concern.

"You're not… going to untie him?"

_Dimitri, who cares way too much for a dead end like him._

Lord Arundel shakes his head as he tugs up his pants. "I paid for this. But if _you_ would like to help with the expenses, I certainly don't mind sharing."

Dimitri averts his gaze, resting it upon the room's closed windows. "No, thank you."

_Dimitri, who is now disgusted by him, finally realizing what kind of person he truly is._ The realization stings more than the bruise he's sure is starting to form by the rope looped around his shoulders, raw and sour as the bile rising to his throat. 

"If you're certain," Lord Arundel says, grinning as he seats himself by the lone table in the room. "These places make the ideal place for clandestine meetings, don't they?"

"...You are not incorrect," Dimitri says as he takes the seat across Lord Arundel, not once looking Felix's way.

"Now, about that peace negotiation you wanted..."

Shifting to a more comfortable position as much as the ropes would allow, Felix folds his legs beneath him, waiting for his arousal to ebb away. Casting his gaze to the side, he takes several slow breaths, concentrating on those as he proceeds to block off the conversation taking place across him. It's his job to sit pretty and be what he's paid to be, and tonight is no different from that. He's nothing more than a toy that's passed around, whose future simply lays under the cover of darkness, destined to bloom under the moonlight alone.

It's better this way, especially when listening to Dimitri's cool, professional tone reminds him of the steely way he disregards him, clearly ashamed of the reality that lay a few feet away from him, unmindful of how Felix's heart slowly breaks at the sound and the realization that comes along with it.

_It's just for a night._

* * *

Felix narrows his eyes at the hulking figure seated across him, very much unimpressed.

"Why are you here?"

Dimitri's eye furrows, confused. "You accepted my request to see you."

"No, I—"

Felix shakes his head. _Incorrigible._ But of course, Dimitri would take it literally. Even if Felix himself is unsure _why_ he accepted the invitation to see Dimitri again.

"...Never mind."

Rolling his eyes, Felix busies himself with pouring out tea into the two cups on the table, one of which he pushes towards Dimitri's side of the table. All of them are hardly mannerisms becoming of a courtesan, but Dimitri did say he liked it better when Felix acts more "natural", whatever the hell that means.

Dimitri accepts the cup and wraps his hands around it, but makes no move to drink it. He seems to prefer intently observing Felix as he downs his tea, a phenomenon that causes Felix no shortage of annoyance as he polishes it off. 

"What?" Felix demands, slamming the empty cup on the table.

Dimitri's eye falls on Felix's pale wrist, now free of bruises. A moment passes before Dimitri answers him, though not without letting out an exhale as he meets Felix's gaze.

"I wanted to make sure you were fine."

"Excuse me?!"

Felix gapes at Dimitri's relieved expression, those words and that soft look the last things he expected to hear or see.

In contrast to Felix's surely comical expression, Dimitri turns serious, solemn as he regards Felix.

"He… didn't hurt you after I left, didn't he?"

"...No."

Nothing that isn't outside the bounds of what he paid for at the time, at least.

Felix sighs, pouring himself another cup. "I'm not… going to break from something like that."

_Physically, at least._ His heart is a whole other question altogether, still raw thanks to certain realizations he is still having difficulty coming to terms to even a week after the fact. Like Dimitri not wanting to do anything with him, and perhaps using this meeting as a way to bring some sort of closure to their "relationship".

Which is why Dimitri leaning over the table to give him a hug comes off as a surprise. Especially when it nearly topples over the cup nearest Dimitri, and spills some of the liquid in Felix's cup onto the floor.

Felix starts, hand still wrapped around the cup as his eyes dart across the table, looking for a safe spot to place it. "You idiot—"

"Thank the goddess."

Dimitri, goddess damn his beastly strength, cuts off the rest of Felix's complaint as he settles with putting the cup on the floor, unsure of the table's stability at the moment. He buries his face into Felix's shoulder, an act that causes no shortage of pink to flood Felix's face.

"I was so worried."

"Get off," Felix says, nudging Dimitri's shoulder. "Watch it, you're going to spill tea all over the place."

"S-Sorry."

Dimitri at least has the grace to look embarrassed when he pulls back, looking away briefly before he clears his throat.

"The tea house matron would not allow me to see you when I asked for you last week."

_Oh._ Felix blinks. That... certainly explains his panic.

"I… wasn't ready for clients for a while," Felix says as he retrieves his cup from the floor. "That's all there is to it."

"I… see."

At those words, Dimitri finally starts on his tea, and it's Felix's turn to stare at Dimitri's thoughtful expression, working on deciphering it.

...There's nothing to read in terms of the question Felix dreads and wants answered, so that leaves him to go for his frustrating last resort.

"If that's all you want from me, then leave."

...Which is voicing his thoughts out loud.

"Hmm?" Dimitri throws him a confused look, akin to a kicked puppy that doesn't know how it wandered into whatever mess it's found itself in. "But I just got here!"

Felix grits his teeth, casting his gaze to the side. "Weren't you done with me after that night?"

"I beg your pardon?"

The level of horror in that statement has Felix looking back at Dimitri, a touch perplexed. Eye wide, Dimitri rapidly shakes his head.

"No, it's not that at all…"

Felix scowls at him. "Then what is it?"

"It's..."

Dimitri hangs his head, staring at his cup of tea as if it would provide the answers he's supposed to give. Then he sighs, running a hand through his hair as he, this time around, averts his gaze.

"...quite the opposite, actually. When I saw you that day, I… had certain thoughts."

"...Carry on," Felix says, folding his arms when Dimitri pauses way too long and shows no indication of wanting to continue.

Dimitri swallows. "I realized… why other people are willing to spend so much on you."

Felix blinks, his mouth an O of surprise before he barks out a short laugh and narrows his eyes at Dimitri. "In case you didn't notice, this _tea house_ is essentially a fancy _brothel_. Or did Syl—_Jose_ not educate you about that fact sufficiently enough?"

Felix _tsks_. Are princes really this dense?! Sure, Dimitri never made moves on him despite it being part of the package he pays for, but certainly he isn't blind enough to what happens around the other rooms. One didn't need two eyes to see that.

"I know!" Dimitri says, shaking his head in what seems to be dismay. "And he did! But..."

Felix unfolds his arms, choosing to prop an elbow on the table and rest his cheek against his lightly fisted hand. "'But'...?"

Dimitri meets his gaze, mouth agape. "You are beautiful, Felix."

"Don't distract me with pointless compliments."

"It's not pointless!" Dimitri says, shaking his head once more. "It is not fair that such a promising person like you has to keep hiding under the cover of night, doing _all_ these things just to make ends meet!"

Dimitri exhales.

"What I saw that night… I... didn't—do _not_—want anyone else doing that to you."

Felix throws him a look of vicious disbelief as he lowers his hand. "Are you trying to run me out of a job?"

"Yes."

Felix rises from his seat, expression twisting as he glowers at Dimitri. Last week may have been shameful on his end, yes, but his job, for the most part, is all he has. Is all he has to be proud of, and for Dimitri to dare put him down like this…

He doesn't care that Dimitri is the crown prince of Faerghus. How _dare_ he. Felix knows he's _good_ at what he does, and for however deplorable his choice of career is, that remains a fact.

"I am going to buy you, Felix."

But before Felix can act on his decision to throw Dimitri out for this slight against his character, Dimitri speaks those impossible words—words that _always_ catch Felix off-guard, words that make him think he can see a light out of this dark tunnel...

"...You can't."

Felix hangs his head, balling his hand into a tight fist. _No, he can't get his hopes up again._ Even if it's Dimitri, he simply _can't_.

"Why not?" Dimitri calls out, defiant as he rises from his seat as well.

Because Felix doesn't know how he'll recover from his heartbreak when Dimitri fails in his task.

"Shut up!" Felix exhales sharply, turning away from Dimitri. "You… don't know what you're talking about."

He can feel Dimitri approach, hovering nearby. "I will not 'shut up' until you explain yourself properly."

"...They'll bleed you dry."

Felix's throat feels tight, but he forces the words out anyway, even if they sound strained. Anything to get Dimitri to stop this ridiculous line of thought.

"You can't afford me. Even if you could, they'll keep running after you with my debts."

Imagined or not.

Dimitri's hands slip around his waist, pulling his back flush against Dimitri's chest. "What if I do not care?"

Despite his reservations on the matter, Felix lays a hand over Dimitri's wrist, letting his arm remain where it is that moment. "...Why?"

Dimitri lowers his head, burying his nose into Felix's hair as he whispers the following words:

"Because I love you."

Felix's shoulders stiffen, his hand tightening around Dimitri's arm as he struggles to wrap those words around his mind. He would be lying if he said he didn't see them coming, but all the same, the actual words being said still bring forth a surge of warmth, a reassurance that he isn't as worthless a human being as the rest of the world likes to think.

"You won't be saying that once they ruin you."

Then coolness as a certain reality hits him, freezing as the night air.

Dimitri shakes his head, giving Felix a squeeze. "I mean what I said. I'll do whatever it takes to get you out of here."

Felix hangs his head, mirroring the shake of Dimitri's head. "You're not the first to say that."

People have tried. Many of his patrons have. But the house always wins.

_It always does._

"Felix."

Dimitri's hand reaches to caress his cheek, warming it with his touch.

"Look at me."

And despite how heavy his heart feels, Felix does, turning on his heel and twisting his body to face Dimitri. He allows Dimitri to tilt his chin up, his uncertain gaze meeting Dimitri's gentle one.

"Do not give up on me just because others have on you."

Felix's lower lip quivers, but he says nothing for the moment, exhaling as he waits for Dimitri to continue.

"But if this is not what you want, then just tell me. I will give up and never come back."

"...No," Felix says almost automatically, fisting a hand into Dimitri's clothing. _Anything but that._ Even if what Dimitri says is a pipe dream, at the very least, he does not want to be robbed of his presence. The only person who sees him for who he is, who has no ulterior motives beyond the pleasure of his company—even at a destructive cost to himself.

Dimitri's eye widens in surprise, almost as if he can't believe what Felix is saying.

"Do you mean—"

Felix doesn't let Dimitri finish that statement, tiptoeing in to seal Dimitri's lips with a kiss. A gasp escapes Dimitri, but a second later, he returns the kiss, keeping a hand pressed against the small of Felix's back as the other hand cups his cheek.

Sinking back to the balls of his feet, Felix keeps the kiss brief, licking his lips before looking to the side.

"Last week, I… didn't want you to see me like that," Felix says, lowering his gaze, "But even then, if you're still fine with me as I am..."

"I want you, Felix," Dimitri says without skipping a beat, "And I will do whatever it takes to make you happy."

Color rushes to his cheeks at those words, heart fluttering at the sentiment.

Felix trains his gaze back on Dimitri. "Anything?"

Dimitri nods. "Yes, anything."

"Then…"

Trailing a finger up Dimitri's chest, Felix lowers his gaze for the moment, following his finger until it reaches the hem of Dimitri's clothing, peeking at Dimitri through lowered lashes.

"...will you finally claim what you've been paying for?"

Dimitri, for a moment, looks lost at those words. Then it clicks one moment later, and he flusters, much to Felix's amusement.

"I…"

Dimitri looks away for a moment, rubbing at the bridge of his nose.

"...perhaps yes, it is... about time I did..."

Felix chuckles, taking that as his cue to pull away from Dimitri and lead the way towards the futon that always remains unused during his visits. The future is still as uncertain as it ever is, but for now, he'll take what he can get, and will give as good as he gets.

And he will allow himself to hope. Just a little.

...It's just for a night, but Felix, lying down and looking up at Dimitri as he straddles him, feels like he may be able to see what lies beyond the dawn.

**Author's Note:**

> Twitter: [slip_fe3h](https://twitter.com/slip_fe3h)


End file.
